Cleaning House

Yesterday I spent the afternoon cleaning out the house I lived in with my ex-husband. It was physically and emotionally grueling. A the end of the day, I felt drained and yet cleansed. It's a task I've avoided since the divorce, but something that needs to be done. Unfortunately, there is a second house that needs to be cleaned out (long story as why there are two houses, but just take my word for it.) and so next weekend will involve more cleaning. Houses are just houses, but it's amazing the energy they take on from the time spent living in them. This house was particularly rough because the end took place there. I felt some of that old energy grip me as I cleaned. So I'm glad it's done.

By the way, I have a computer desk, a bookshelf, printer, lamps, an exercise ball, oil based space heater, two baby gates and some random dishes for any takers. E-mail me...

There was something that my ex-husband left at the house that I needed to get back to him, so I took it to our former best friends' house. The husband of this couple was out in the garage. Suddenly I felt like I had been hit by a tank. And I couldn't' talk. He asked me what was new. The answer "everything" seemed appropriate. I heard myself trying to tell him how happy I am now and that I'm doing really well, but it was out of body. He looked at me with a look of pity and possibly a little judgment and I was wiggling in my skin. I rambled on for a little bit longer, handed him the thing and left, sending greetings to his wife and telling them to call me for a drink if they were in my neighborhood. (I'll be surprised if I hear from them.)

After the awkward delivery, I needed some time with my friends. The friends who have been there for me to help me clean up this entire mess. I called the one friend I know I can always go to.

What are you doing?

Working

Beer in two?

And beer and yummy Mexican food later, I felt the energy from my new life return with a big 'ole virtual bear hug.